If you are over thirty then chances are you have at least a vague recollection of Showaddywaddy from when they regularly enjoyed chart success (if you don’t remember them (shame on you!) or you are a bit younger then check them out on You Tube!).

Showaddywaddy were the first band I ever went to see live in concert. I was about ten and my mum took me and my brother to see them play in Cardiff. I remember it was very loud and I didn’t have a clue what was going on.

And I saw them another few times when I was a bit older. But it was the time I saw them in 2006 that made my anxiety rocket and tested my confidence levels.

Feel The Fear

The reason for my anxiety was that I’d decided to secretly arrange to propose to my girlfriend (now wife…hope that doesn’t spoil the ending….) on stage during a Showaddywaddy concert in Cambridge. If you’ve read some of my other articles, you’ll know that in those days confidence wasn’t anywhere near my top ten resources.

And a couple of months before, when I’d lined the whole thing up, it had seemed like a great idea. I was far too busy putting my plan into operation to give much thought to what I was actually planning to do at the end of it.

I had to sort the tickets, get the ring, contact the band’s agent, get their agreement and work out exactly how I was going to get us both on stage without giving the game away too early. And I had to keep it secret for at least two months.

Confidently Feeling Anxious

The day of the proposal couldn’t have been more stressful. It was the height of winter and our heating packed in, I had an important meeting at work and I had to somehow go and get the ring without tipping anyone off about what I was up to.

Yet these things were nothing compared to the feeling I had sat there at the concert watching the support acts. Several times I contemplated backing out. My hands constantly kept checking the ring was still hidden in my pocket. And I can’t be certain but I think my heart was beating louder than any of the drums could manage.

Thoughts raced through my mind. What if we weren’t on stage at the right time? What if I made a mess of what I was going to say and the 300 or so people in the audience thought I was stupid? What if she was disappointed or embarrassed or I made an idiot of myself? I’d already told our families what I was going to do – what would I tell them if I bottled it?

What had seemed such a good idea weeks before was now something I didn’t seem fully prepared for.

Just Do It!

And then the moment came and, down on one knee, I did it.

And even better I got to meet the awesome Showaddywaddy!!

Fear, panic and Showaddywaddy

And whilst you may not ever wish to meet Showaddywaddy (what’s wrong with you!), here are some things to think about when you want to blast through your fear and take action:

  • Sometimes we all need a bit more confidence

Sometimes we all need a bit more confidence and we consider, even for a split second, backing out and going for a safer option.

No-one has ever moaned about having too much confidence and until you step out of that comfort zone and take action you’ll never know what you can achieve in your life.

  • Take massive positive action – with the smallest possible steps

If you want to achieve something big in your life – whether it’s business success or moving your personal life forward – think big! There’s no point aiming for half measures in the hope you get there when you could aim for the stars.

So take massive positive action – and do it one step at a time. Even if you only do the smallest thing every day, in no time at all you’ll have made more progress that you ever imagined.

  • Take action before you feel you’re ready

If you wait until you feel 100% ready for something or are 100% prepared for every eventuality that may happen, then you’ll never do anything except think and plan.

Both thinking and planning are useful things – but you also need their good friend action.

Sometimes you’ve got to let the adrenaline fire you up and do what you intend to do.

  • Enrol your supporting cast

If you don’t tell anyone what you intend to do then it’s much easier to procrastinate, dilute or avoid what you originally intended – just because you felt that fear inside you. And remember fear is just False Evidence Appearing Real.

So tell someone whose opinion you care about what you are planning – and start thinking ahead to how good it will be when you get to tell them all about how well it went afterwards.

  • Picture Success

Too often people I meet spend their time imagining things going wrong or turning out badly. Often they end up in a cycle of feeling bad about things that haven’t even happened (except in their minds).

So invest some time thinking how you do want things to go. Imagine the success, how good it will feel, all the great feedback you’ll hear and even all those great things you’ll say to yourself when you’ve actually done it. Start programming your mind for success and feeling good knowing everything is happening perfectly.

Help to end anxiety and increase confidence

If you would like to have a chat about how you can reduce your anxiety levels and boost your confidence then call me on 01353 669941 and ask to book a free consultation.

Dan Regan

Hypnotherapy in Ely & Newmarket

www.danreganhypnotherapy.co.uk